She has to attend a wedding this weekend with someone who she knows is a racist. How can she get through this wedding delicately?
Hi Bert Show,
I’m reaching out because I need advice going into this weekend. My boyfriend and I have been together for
over 8 months now. I will be attending his cousin’s out of town wedding where I will meet his parents and
one his brothers for the first time. As well as the rest of his dad’s side of the family. If that’s not enough
pressure, the wedding I’m attending is interracial (black/white). I’m black, my boyfriend is white and his
mom is a closet racist.Here’s my dilemma: currently, my boyfriend is not speaking to his parents. A month ago he went to visit them and during that visit he and his mom got into an argument surrounding Breona Taylor and George Floyd. Multiple things were said, but his breaking point was when she said, we shouldn’t even know George and Breona’s name because they were bad people who are responsible for their own deaths because they did bad things. My boyfriend is very supportive of racial justice, gender rights and just about anything involving people having a fair opportunity in this world, so her comments sent him over the edge and their conversation ended with him calling her P.O.S. racist. He left the next day and has had limited conversations with her since.
My boyfriend is open about the rude comments she’ll make here or there, but he says she only says these
types of things around him and his dad and acts totally different when his brothers and other people are
around. She has been asking to meet me since the holidays and my boyfriend says that she would always ask
how I was doing when they were on speaking terms. The thing is I’ve dated men from all types of nationalities, but I am naive in the fact that this is the first time I’ve dated someone with racist parents (and I say parents because when his dad found out I was black he asked if my boyfriend was dating me because it would be trendy).Bert Show, we are headed to the wedding weekend Friday morning and I will meet his brother, brother’s
girlfriend and his parents when we arrive.I don’t know how to go into this situation especially since my boyfriend is still avoiding his parents. Give me the answers. How should I go into this weekend?
I’m fully vaccinated and really looking forward to the wedding minus, well, the family part.
-“Lindsay”