What do you do when you find out that your dad is cheating with his doctor? Not only is this woman his doctor but she’s your mom’s doctor too! So what do you do?! Tell your mom or not?
Hi Bert Show,
I am a 34 year old daughter whose parents have been married for 38 years. I could really use some advice as this situation is far more unique than just the typical “Dad cheated on Mom scenario.”
My parents have been married since their early 20’s and my Mom has battled a chronic disease for the last 20 plus years.
Last spring, I was out of town when I got a phone call from my Mom that she had left my Dad and was at my home with all her belongings. Luckily, I have an amazing husband who was home with our child and was able to help out. My Mom explained that she suspected something was off between my Dad and his doctor for some time and had dug into their phone records. With phone calls and texts at all hours and strategically placed during periods when she was visiting my house. She concluded she had found the actual proof for something she had a gut feeling about months prior.
Anyways, I get back in town after a couple days and that same day my parents meet and have a conversation. She comes back and moves all her stuff back home. I asked her for an explanation. She said that my Dad had told her it was strictly a friendship. Mind you, this doctor is not much older than myself and my Dad is in his late 60’s. He told her that she was just being paranoid, and it was because of the medicine she takes daily that basically made her crazy. I told my Mom I would stand behind whatever she chose to do and/or believe. If she truly believed his explanation and felt she was wrong about it, then I would follow her lead.
Fast forward to this past holiday season. I cannot say how I found out…but I found out, definitively, that the infidelity happened and that there was persuasion from the doctor for my Dad to leave my Mom. And if that all wasn’t enough, here’s the kicker. This person is also MY doctor, and MY MOM’S DOCTOR!! I cannot explain how much of a mind F this all is…. Do I keep this information to myself knowing my Mom sees this person on a monthly basis? Do I tell my Mom she was right and her medication had no impact on her gut feeling? Do I confront my Dad about it? Help!!!